I’m starting to suspect Chebri of growing frustrated; it seems that in every exchange with her, her smack gets less articulate. Tonight (after the last post) she started having to censor her own vowels.

It went like this. I was back in the game, flying around in a fast frigate making bookmarks of military utility. I noticed local flashing, had a look, and discovered that Chebri was trolling it with smacktalk:

[ 02:12:20 ] Chebri > isn’t it funny…
[ 02:12:39 ] Chebri > bullies think they’re all bad and push people around…
[ 02:12:48 ] Chebri > but then…
[ 02:12:52 ] Chebri > when the heat is on
[ 02:12:56 ] Chebri > they can’t take it
[ 02:13:00 ] Chebri > run n hide
[ 02:13:05 ] Chebri > chicken sh*t
[ 02:14:14 ] Chebri > steal from people
[ 02:14:26 ] Chebri > ruin someone else’s day…ha ha fun n games
[ 02:14:37 ] Chebri > but when the situation is reversed…
[ 02:14:47 ] Chebri > cry in a blog

Honestly, up until I saw the last line, I wasn’t even sure she was talking about me. But the blog seemed fairly likely to refer to this one, even if I don’t remember crying here.

I’m happy to leave local smack to my enemies, but this seemed like a good opportunity to advertise the blog and let folks decide for themselves about the crying:

[ 02:15:49 ] Marlenus > Cry? Ironfleet.com, folks, judge for yourself. For smacktalk, listen to Chebri.

And then, suddenly, things got interesting.

Allow me to digress. In the history of this blog, I’ve only deleted one comment (spams excluded). That one, I found in the moderation queue this morning (all first-time commenters are held in moderation until I’ve had time to review the comment.) It consisted of some anti-salvager propaganda, rather rudely stated. By itself, I might have passed it on through moderation, for entertainment purposes. But the commenter was too chickenshit (to use Chebri’s phrase, with all its vowels) to leave their EVE identity, plus they left a false email featuring the infamous old goatse.cs anal stretching domain, plus they provided (as their blog link) a link to the charming “two girls, one cup” scat-eating video that’s all the rage among the YouTube generation this week. Taken as a whole, the comment didn’t seem worth publishing.

For future reference, I’ll publish almost anything you readers want to say, negative commentary on Ironfleet included, if you use your active EVE pilot name and keep it civil. But this is my blog; I’m not going to let anonymous cowards insult me using my own bandwidth. Get your own blog for that, k thnx bye.

Now, about those anonymous cowards. Want to know what Chebri’s very next words in local were, after the quote above?

[ 02:16:19 ] Chebri > it’s a blog
[ 02:16:27 ] Chebri > he’s the only one allowed to speak – he deleted comments
[ 02:16:35 ] Chebri > his own pedestal

PWNed, Chebri, you’ve been pwned and outed as the anonymous coward in question.

After that, the smack got fairly dull. Chebri, like a lot of combat pilots, likes to throw insults around in an attempt to get some action. I prefer to keep things nice and dull, so we discussed that for awhile. Nobody seems to understand that courage in a salvage pilot is an expensive luxury that eats away profit margins. If I’m shooting, it’s because I expect to win, or I’m reasonably confident I can escape. Chebri in particular kept trying to spin her trip to structure as an ignominious moment for me:

[ 02:19:50 ] Chebri > yeah…yer docked and can’t go steal
[ 02:19:59 ] Marlenus > Er, I’m not docked….
[ 02:20:09 ] Marlenus > I’m busily making stealth bomber warp points as we speak
[ 02:20:09 ] Chebri > you aren’t stealing
[ 02:20:22 ] Marlenus > I never steal, remember?
[ 02:20:26 ] Chebri > thank you for flying a tin can
[ 02:21:28 ] Marlenus > I heart my tin cans, they get the job done. Which of us was into structure tonight? Not me…
[ 02:21:49 ] Chebri > you didn’t pop me either – you ran…and I was in structure – chicken
[ 02:22:01 ] Marlenus > I prefer to call it conservative, thanks.
[ 02:22:13 ] Marlenus > Like I say, not a combat pilot. Luckily for you, or you’d be dead.
[ 02:22:21 ] Chebri > pff
[ 02:22:24 ] Chebri > you wish
[ 02:22:33 ] Marlenus > Not really, don’t much care actually.
[ 02:22:44 ] Chebri > empty threat then
[ 02:22:53 ] Marlenus > Not a threat at all
[ 02:23:02 ] Marlenus > Just a post-action analysis

Some of Chebri’s AC-ME confederates joined the conversation, which was entertaining and further instructional on the close link between this war and AC-ME’s interests, but they kept pretty close to AC-ME’s no-smack policy, which I do appreciate.

5 Responses to “Smacktalk From Chebri”

  1. Kirith Kodachi says:

    This is just a vote of approval for your blog, your corp, and you.

    Keep up the good work keeping the space lanes clear for the rest of us!
    Cheers, KK

  2. Marlenus says:

    Thanks, Kirith! I appreciate the kind words.

  3. Chebri says:

    And still you only present part of the events and not the entire story. You say you only shoot back if shot on first. That’s not true. You initiated engagement twice and ran twice.

    I do appreciate your creativity, however, when you steal from others you suffer consequences. Even though you choose to call it ‘salvaging’ when you take ore from miners it is theft. Concord views it as theft and gives the miners 15 minutes to retaliate. By declaring war on you, I don’t have to wait for you to steal for you to be flagged. I can shoot you as you approach a can. That, in itself, is the entire goal of the war – ore theft prevention. So far, it has been a complete success. You’ve not stolen any more ore from ACME.

    You’ve assumed a lot of other things that simply are not true. ACME didn’t know I was going to war dec you until it happened. They did not pay me. They do not support my efforts in any way other than to give a shout out if they see you near their mining efforts. That is all.

  4. Marlenus says:

    Chebri, we’ll never agree about the semantic issues.

    However, you’re simply not telling the truth about AC-ME not supporting your war. During one of our encounters, you were in space (not at any standard warp in location) and an AC-ME player in a drake warped in to your location, which would have been difficult unless you were in the same fleet. And you then warped to several nearby locations, then back to your fleet member (who was in AC-ME). That is only one of the occasions when I have observed you flying with AC-ME members during our war. In once case, you traveled several jumps and arrived at my location simultaneously with an AC-ME member. They *are* supporting your war, and I don’t know why you would choose to lie about this.

    Remember that I am often observing you from behind cloak.

  5. Marlenus says:

    Chebri, I should also clear up a misunderstanding. Your “you say you only shoot back if shot on first” is not a fair characterization of Ironfleet policy. In times of peace, we shoot back if shot at, and we shoot at people who take from our cans, just as everyone does.

    In wartime, of course, there are no rules. Expect the unexpected.

    Are you actually trying to sound aggrieved that I shot at you after you declared war on me? What, exactly, did you expect?

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