Archive for the 'Today In Ironfleet' Category

So today, I filed my first-ever EVE petition.

I avoid lag, I try to be careful, and I’m pretty willing to accept losses imposed by an imperfect gaming environment. So, in about a year of play, I’ve never felt the need to petition.

So, today. Saw a full can of ore. Went to haul some. Hauled some. Went back. Hauled some more. Docked.

Looked at local. Whoa, smack city!

LordThyGod > fuck you
Takeda Shiko > Uh?
LordThyGod > Martelenus is stealing ym ore byt the transprt full!@
Takeda Shiko > That was random and… vulgar…
LordThyGod > Marlenus
LordThyGod > So do veterans often steal ore in 30 mil ships?
LordThyGod > bitch ass baiter
Takeda Shiko > zowie
Ebodhisatva > lol
Takeda Shiko > Maybe he’s guilty as charged?
Ebodhisatva > why should he?
Ebodhisatva > he’d rather get blown to pieces
Marlenus > LOL, was busy hauling ore
Ebodhisatva > roflmao
Baron Kalan > /emote sniggers
Ebodhisatva > so you find a nice filled can
Ebodhisatva > and just take it
LordThyGod > coke on a can of quafe and die loser
Marlenus > Was a couple of full cans full, needed multiple trips
Takeda Shiko > Marlenus, that’s just wrong.
Marlenus > Obviously, I disagree
Takeda Shiko > I’m sorry that you think it’s funny
Ebodhisatva > that is indeed like leaving your brand new porsche running while being away
LordThyGod > thats my hard work jerk
Ebodhisatva > man i’d take it for a spin
Marlenus > No, the funny part was that folks think I’d be reading local while I was busy working
Takeda Shiko > Obviously, you’re a jackass, too… but whatever
Marlenus > Salvage is my profession, I take it very seriously
Ebodhisatva > lord, get some secure cans
Ebodhisatva > than you’ll be safe
Ebodhisatva > that is like making sure your new porsche is locked when you leave it
Takeda Shiko > Salvage is blowing stuff up and using a salvager… ripping people off is stealing. And it reflects on you and your corp.
LordThyGod > you just liek to pick fight dont you?
Takeda Shiko > *Shrugs* Doesn’t matter to me too much though… different strokes and all that.
LordThyGod > want me to fire so you can come back in a BS
Ebodhisatva > it’s even better, you get to kill him
Marlenus > Agree that it reflects on my corp — have you read the corporate description? This is what we do.
Ebodhisatva > he steals and you can kill him!
LordThyGod > I hope you get banned
Ebodhisatva > that is really neat!
LordThyGod > Not when he has 7 months on me
Takeda Shiko > Unfortunately, Lord, this game has a lot of room for griefers.
LordThyGod > gotta pick on the newbs
LordThyGod > what a loser
Ebodhisatva > just kill him!
Ebodhisatva > get some friends and hunt him down!
LordThyGod > a yerar in the game and he cant make money on his own he has to steal ore
Takeda Shiko > What’s sad is he’s doing it in Higher Sec spcae
Takeda Shiko > space*
Takeda Shiko > You expect this in low sec space
Takeda Shiko > “Check me out, I just ripped off a newb! Look at all my SCORDITE!”
Ebodhisatva > ow man, if it is red in my overview, he’s screwed
Ebodhisatva > you can even wardec him
LordThyGod > I know
Ebodhisatva > it’ll cost 50 mill, but it feels soooo good
Ebodhisatva > you can hunt him down the whole frecking week
abissshooter > lol
Ebodhisatva > hell, you can even give privateer alliance 50 mill to do it for you
Dranoel > I’d kick your ass if this were RL.
Ebodhisatva > man, he won’t ever leave station
Ebodhisatva > ever
Dranoel > Nope
Takeda Shiko > Yeah, most jerkies that my old corp put a hit out on just sat in a station and played an alt
Takeda Shiko > wow… Marlenus is the CEO of the corp… of 7 members… why am I not surprised?

So far, so normal. A bunch of smack, I defend myself lightly, that triggers a lot more smack, I can deal with that. But then came the interesting part. Tell me what you think:

Dranoel > Do you liek dev’s Marlenus ?
Dranoel > Do you knwo I”m part of ISD?
Dranoel > You’ve picked a bad ememy to make.
Takeda Shiko > ISD?
Dranoel > Interstellar Services Department.
Dranoel > I hope you liek getting podded.
Takeda Shiko > Hmm… enlighten me please?
Dranoel > :)
Dranoel > We handle bugs, pettions, the help chennel and the rookie channels.
Takeda Shiko > and griefers in 0.7 space?
Dranoel > And update testing.

Dranoel > Thieves in RL get thier faces stommped in for stealing from me.
Dranoel > Gonna come out now that the timers over?
Dranoel > OR are you gonna keep hiding in your T@ ship
Dranoel > T2 indy just for stealing ore
Takeda Shiko > Baron, the point in question isn’t that he stole ore… it’s that he is a much more powerful veteran character stealing from a newer character in High Sec space… it’s just… tasteless
Dranoel > Thats dedication to being an asshole
Dranoel > Don’t worry, my friends in ISD will make him lose far more isk than he will gain from that ore. :D

Dranoel > aw he came abck!
Dranoel > Gotta run from em cause I’m not in a Osprey?
Marlenus > Right, because a transport ought to stay and fight with a battlecruiser, that would be very smart.
Dranoel > ^ Ore thief
Marlenus > Salvager, if you please
Dranoel > Smart is not stealing from ISD
Dranoel > I don’t please
Marlenus > Smart is not getting banned for threatening to abuse the powers of the volunteers
Dranoel > I hope you die a firey death at the hands of my friends.
Dranoel > I’m not threatening
Dranoel > I’m promising
Dranoel > They volunteered

Now, don’t get me wrong. So far as I know, the ISD volunteers do good work and they don’t have many special powers to abuse, if any. So I consider this an empty threat.

But I do know that CCP Games cannot afford, just now, to have people running around claiming “special connections” and threatening people with the abuse of those connections. The game doesn’t need that.

Or so it seems to me. I filed a petition and attached the logs, just in case.

Back to local, where (if you can believe it) they were still smacking me.

Marlenus > OK, petition filed
Takeda Shiko > Wow… my first petition?
Takeda Shiko > or just against Dranoel?
Marlenus > You’ve done nothing petitionable that I know of
Dranoel > Prolly me but it wont go anywhere.
Takeda Shiko > Well, i DID use a naughty word.
Marlenus > But claiming to be in ISD or to abuse ISD “powers” is banning offense
Takeda Shiko > *blushes*
Marlenus > Lotsa naughty words in the world, I’m a big boy
Takeda Shiko > Fair enough
Dranoel > Telling you that my friends in ISD are on the hunt for you, is not.
Marlenus > But that’s not what you said. No worries, gms will sort it out. I don’t care if anything happens to you, I just want them to be aware that ISD is being used as a threat.
Dranoel > I didn’t threaten you eith them
Dranoel > I warned you
Dranoel > i didn’t make the decision
Marlenus > Not my call

Which it isn’t. But I do know that the “Suspension and Ban Policy” states:


Severe offenses may result in an immediate ban without warning; however, warnings may be given for first time offenses, followed by account suspensions of varying degree and ultimately a permanent ban if a player:

* a. Presents himself as a CCP employee, game master or other customer service representative, or a member of the EVE volunteer program.

And I’d say the claim that “Do you knwo I”m part of ISD?” sounds like presenting himself as a member of the Eve volunteer program.

One final gem from the smack, which continued at length, until a new party entered the system and became curious about it:

Felgor > Did soemoen go boom?
Daloron > nope someone did steal
Marlenus > No, but some jettisoned ore went home to a hangar the mining ship never left from.
Daloron > from a newb
Takeda Shiko > I don’t think so, but marlenus ripped someone off.
Marlenus > Mining barge does not equal newb I wouldn’t think.
Felgor > Sounds like Marlenus will soon have a bounty on his head :P
Takeda Shiko > psh… bounties are just collected by a buddy
Dranoel > Brought a Badger II JUST to steal form me
Marlenus > No point in salvaging jettisoned ore in a small ship.
Raest > that’s the spirit
Dranoel > If I had fired, he gets 15 mins to attack me in w/e ship he wants
Marlenus > Ya gotta move that stuff in industrial quantities if you want to see a decent profit.
Dranoel > I had planned on it but you stole it befor ei Could

So many comebacks, but I was laughing too hard to type. So I let it drop with a LOL, and moved on.

This post is for the personal entertainment of one of my buddies. I told him a long and wild tale about some run-ins I had with a newie-ish pilot in a Rokh battleship. And I was going to post that story here. I survived and triumphed in ways that should have been impossible. It was a great story.

I’ve seen this pilot over several days. I could swear he was in a Rokh when I first saw him. But his performance this morning was pretty lame for a battleship.

When I pulled out my logs this morning to write up the story, something unfortunate became clear. Perhaps he was in a Rokh yesterday. But this morning, he was in a Cormorant destroyer.

I thought that icon looked a bit small in the overview.

Anyway, that means no story. “And then, get this, I managed to get my breakfast all the way to the table without spilling it!” There’s just no accomplishment to it.

Sorry bud, I feel sheepish for telling you that pile of whoppers!

I got my first good scare in weeks, playing Eve today.

I’ve got a salvage Merlin that’s all about speed. Salvagers up top, salvage rigs aboard, speed fittings in the lows. It’s specialized for salvaging wrecks that, shall we say, I did not cultivate.

With those salvage rigs fitted, it’s a very expensive Merlin, and I would hate to lose it. So normally, when flying the Miniluxe Salvager, I avoid the wrecks that have loot in them (this will change after tomorrow’s patch).

So, today. Sweep of the belts. Cleaning up empty wrecks. Ignored three corp-branded wrecks in the first belt that still had loot in them.

Finished the belt sweep. On my way back to the station. I’m docking anyway, why not stop by and clean up those three wrecks?

Warp in. There are the four wrecks again, lock ’em and get to work.

About the time I clear the loot from the first wreck, my brain kicks in.

Wait a minute, four wrecks? I could swear there were three here just mere moments ago. It’s odd for somebody to pass through and pop a rat that fast…

And as my eyes flicked nervously to the overview, *blink* there’s now a frigate-sized icon on it, 30 clicks away. Click, Manticore? Stealth Bomber? Targetting me? FLASHING RED? RED? RED? WARP YOU LAZY ENGINE ROOM SODS, CRUISE MISSILES INCOMING! WARP! WARP LIKE YOU’VE NEVER WARPED BEFORE! OMG There go my shields WARP DAMMIT WARP I SAY!

My warp was slow and inelegant, because I was bobbing on the wreck. The first salvo hit me and ate about three quarter of my shields, and I was gone (with much screaming) before the second salvo hit. In subsequent conversation with the very cool Manticore pilot, I found out just how lucky I was. He’d had the skills to fly his Manticore for just a couple of hours, and he didn’t have the fitting skills to fit all three cruise missile launchers, nor all the ship and missile skills to make them extra deadly. But even so, his first salvo hit me for 367 points, and my ship has less than 1200 points total. If I’d stayed stuck on that wreck for another couple of salvos, it would have been very ugly indeed.

All’s well that ends well, as they say. But, having been on the receiving end of a stealth bomber for the first time in my Eve career, I’ve gotta say, they don’t feel quite as worthless as the forum warriors claim they are. With better skills he could have instapopped me, and if I had been just a smidge more inattentive, he’d have got me anyway.

It was just like last time. There I was, minding my own business, autopiloting in a speed-fitted Executioner (frigate) around the galaxy collecting parts to build a couple of Gravity Capacitor Upgrade rigs.

Yeah. Sad to say, the tissue-paper Heron onto which I fitted the last pair had an unfortunate accident after jumping through a mission acceleration gate. Nobody said the life of a salvage explorer was easy.

Anyway, I came through a jumpgate and spotted a fat Armageddon wreck about thirty clicks out. Zoom zoom, it’s full of cheap large lasers (ten of them!) and supporting cap gear. More than will fit in my frigate hold.

Take a load to nearest station, come back. Now there’s a Condor orbiting the wreck, with a name suggesting an alt of the wreck owner. Apparently there’s no agro, because he orbits quietly while I finish looting the wreck and turn on my salvagers.

Bonus! Salvage is six melted capacitor consoles, very likely worth more than all the heavy lasers and related gear.

“Oh, the salvage life
is the life for me
with a rum tum tiddly-um rum tum tee
and I never ever ever give a fig about the weather
for the salvager’s life is the life for meeee!”

So I was minding my own business, autopiloting in a speed-fitted Executioner (frigate) around the galaxy collecting parts to build a couple of Gravity Capacitor Upgrade rigs (for faster scan probing). Suddenly through my cockpit window I notice a swarm of Hammerhead IIs chewing on each other.

Well, where the drones are swarming, salvage often follows. So I scroll out to get a sense of the tactical picture, and see a Curse attacking a Raven. Since the Curse is closing on the Raven, I select the Raven, hit “approach”, and hit my microwarp drive.

Beep beep! I felt like I was driving a little Nash Rambler with Roadrunner decals as I blew past the curse just as the Raven turned into a shiny yellow triangle. I whipped out my trusty wreck-opener (don’t leave home without it) and began stuffing battleship gear into my tiny frigate hold. Three Arbalest Siege Missile Launchers, an X-Large C5-L shield booster, some Tech II Magnetic Scattering Amplifiers, and I’m stuffed. No time to look over my shoulder and see whether this dearly departed battleship has friends, just hit the autopilot and GO GO GO! With another hearty “Beep beep!” and a cloud of thruster gas, I was Out Of There.

Inevitably, there was grumbling from the feller in the Curse. A convo request later and I’m hearing a demand and an insult. Not that the demand would have been satisfied in any case, but the insult made it a very short conversation:

Geoff C > return the stuff or face war noob
Marlenus > Insult? Bye.

A good thirty second’s salvage work if I do say so myself.

Yo, if you’re going to mine into a giant secure can, don’t forget to anchor the mofo first, mkay?

Kendolph, this means you. And thank you for the pyroxeres.

The moral of this story is, sometimes new characters drop great salvage.

A few days ago, I noticed the Alphabet Boys mining in one of the systems where I tend to hang out. I called them the Alphabet Boys because they were four of them mining in Bantams, and they were named assky, bssky, cssky, and dssky.

Now, normally I don’t mess with Bantam miners. Been there, done that, was glad to move past it. But, in my experience, groups like this, with names like that, grow up to be macro-miners, asteroid farmers, or worse. And besides, they were jettisoning Rich Plagioclase like it was sewage. So, over the course of several days, I several times grabbed up half a hauler full of ore that I found drifting in their vicinity.

During that process, I noticed that cssky was sometimes to be seen in an Osprey cruiser.

So this morning, I warp into the belt in my Crane to see bssky in his Bantam, mining into a jetcan “owned” (if things that have been jettisoned could be said to be owned) by cssky, who was present — but not mining — in the Osprey. As I approached the can, cssky warped away. I salvaged the abandoned ore, and — curious to see what cssky might be up to — hung around for a bit.

Back comes cssky, full of wrath and vengeance and light missiles. He’s had a chance to refit, and a Crane transport versus a properly fitted (not mining fitted) Osprey can get into a world of hurt. So I warp back to the dock, as cssky flashes an angry red in my rear view mirror.

Light missiles? And he was missing me with some kind of gun? That’s not a properly fitted (which is to say, that’s not a dangerous) Osprey.

So out of my transport I jumps, and into the Iron Crowbar, a salvage Ferox whose purpose in life is prying up salvage that’s not properly nailed down.

Back to the belts. Is friend cssky still there? Why yes, there he is, and in handy warp scramble range, too.

Pew pew pew. Remember the first rule of dealing with Ironfleet: our salvage vessels may look helpless, and sometimes they are. But we do have other ships, and when you open fire on us, we will shoot back.

In the event, it took less than three full volleys of mixed heavy missiles for cssky to go kaboom. I didn’t expect to get to salvage the wreck, because bssky was right beside it in a Bantam. But I targetted him just for fun, and as a distraction, while lumbering in for my salvage. And what to my wondering eye should appear in the wreck, but a tasty multi-million ISK Local Hull Conversion Expanded Cargo I?

To date, I think that’s the best thing that’s dropped from a ship that’s been foolish enough to shoot at Ironfleet salvage vessels.

The killmail was illuminating. The pair of Limos standard missile launchers on a cruiser is less than optimum, though fairly common. But lasers?

2007.02.14 17:08
Victim: cssky
Alliance: NONE
Corp: State War Academy
Destroyed: Osprey
System: [redacted]
Security: 0.7
Involved parties:
Name: Marlenus (laid the final blow)
Security: 1.1
Alliance: NONE
Corp: Ironfleet Towing And Salvage
Ship: Ferox
Weapon: Scourge Heavy Missile
Destroyed items:
Multifrequency S
Small Shield Booster I
Dual Light Beam Laser I
Dual Light Beam Laser I
Multifrequency S
Upgraded 'Limos' Standard Missile Bay I

One of the salvage activities I’ve enjoyed from my first weeks in the game is “busting” deep safespots. Back in the day — before probing was improved — it was apparently pretty safe to leave ships and gear drifting in safe spots far from the ecliptic. These days, not so safe. But it can still take quite a lot of scanning to find small items in deep safes. And it’s a lot of fun looking, you never know what you’ll find. I’ve found cruisers, industrials, cans full of torpedoes, once a shuttle full of expensive blueprints.

Today I found an old safespot, one belonging to a player who started in 2004. There was an anchored Giant Secure Can full of large ammo (which I can’t get at, drat it, unless I can guess the password), an empty shuttle named Cargo Container, and a combat-fitted Merlin frigate named — you guessed it — Cargo Container. Not a treasure, but fun to find. And of course I’ll save the location against the day that they ever decide to let stale unused Giant Secure Containers float free of their anchors. Scoop!

As predicted, The Griefer’s Alliance withdrew its war declaration against Ironfleet yesterday, without having landed a single shot on any Ironfleet vessel. (I think they fired a few from extreme range, but I’m not sure.)

So yesterday they declare war, last night I got a stomach flu that put me in a foul mood, and today I get a convo from the official shakedown man for The Griefer’s Alliance. Of course, he’s just trying to help me, by making me an offer I can’t refuse.

Only, I can:

korlel > hi
Marlenus > Hello
korlel > lokk mate i cant be botherd with tihs war
Marlenus > So drop it already?
Marlenus > *I* didn't start it.
korlel > my co wont
Marlenus > LOL, get a better corp?
Marlenus > Because you guys are just lame anyway
korlel > but i have some say in this corp
korlel > look mate dont think where weak
Marlenus > I've seen all the ibises on the killboard, you can't be weak if you can slaughter ibises
Marlenus > Zero respect here, that's just how it is
korlel > cool
korlel > im not here to pick a fight
Marlenus > No, you guys already picked it. So, what can I do for you?
korlel > look im here behind my co's back
korlel > he dont know im talking to u
Marlenus > And you want...?
korlel > im trying to sort it out
Marlenus > I'm listening, but this war is all you guys, don't really see what I can do to help "sort it out"
korlel > you can help alot it's only u that can help
Marlenus > Yes?
korlel > 200mil and ur free
Marlenus > LOL, LOL, LOL, no
korlel > you like sitting in a station
Marlenus > You guys never leave Kisogo
Marlenus > And I am very mobile
Marlenus > You'll never see me if I don't want you to
Marlenus > And I'll never give you any sport
korlel > lol
Marlenus > This war dec has ZERO effect on me
Marlenus > Eventually you'll get tired of paying the bill and drop it, everyone does
Marlenus > I don't do PvP
Marlenus > So, that would be "no."
korlel > lmao
korlel > we have been to ur hq
Marlenus > I've seen your killboard, you don't have a single kill outside the newbie areas
korlel > we can find u anywhere in eve
Marlenus > Sure you can, and when you do, I'll be nine jumps away. Have fun with that.
Marlenus > Oh, sure, I might lob a few missiles at you from extreme range on days when I'm bored, but I don't take my ships in harm's way, never have.
Marlenus > With warp to zero and a good set of bookmarks, you can't hurt me if I don't want to fight
Marlenus > And I don't
Marlenus > This is not my first wardec
Marlenus > I'm a salvager, we're not popular
Marlenus > But nobody's ever had any joy out of me
Marlenus > One guy even hired Murder Death Kill to come after me, they never even managed to get in the same local grid as me
Marlenus > The war is a joke and a waste of your money, even if you were'nt a bunch of newbie-popping self-confessed griefers.
korlel > lkk at killbord again ull notice a few names on there
Marlenus > Sorry, but you simply don't have any credibility, too many dead Ibises on your killboard
Marlenus > It was seven Ibises out of ten kills last time I looked
korlel > maybe but that is a few members of this cor and even the aliance
Marlenus > Including your ceo
korlel > he helps us
Marlenus > You need *help* popping newbies?
Marlenus > This just gets funnier and funnier
korlel > it would cost more to get mercs in
Marlenus > Look, you're wasting my time. Ironfleet does not pay tribute, never has, never will. And we don't respect newbie killers. So drop the wardec if you don't want the war, or don't drop it, but I don't have much more to say on the subject.
korlel > look at our wars we havent lost
Marlenus > You're not going to *lose* this one either, because I'm not going to fight. It takes two to tango. But you're not going to *win*, either.
Marlenus > You're just wasting your money, and I might get lucky, that destroyer of Pacca's will pop pretty quick if I catch him at the right heavy missile range.
korlel > ok fine i tried to help you
Marlenus > LOL, extortion demands are not "help"
Marlenus > Ironfleet out

I checked these boys out earlier today, they were hanging around Kisogo in three battlecruisers and a destroyer. Ironfleet doesn’t have the combat power to engage them, but it doesn’t matter; they’d have to hunt me for weeks to catch me, and they won’t give up that much newbie-popping.